For as long as I can remember, I always knew I wanted to be a mom. God had placed that “wish” on my heart to have my own family one day. I would daydream and imagine a life with my husband and our children. I recall early childhood memories with my sisters, pretending we were mommies. All our baby dolls were lined up. Each with a special name thoughtfully picked out. Being a mom was never an ‘if’ but always a ‘when’ for me. I never imagined where I would go to college or what my career would be, but rather how large my family would be.
As life played out and my faith in God grew, as a young adult I started to realize just how fragile that “wish” was. The thing I had wished for my whole life began to be a prayer deep in my heart between myself and God. I started to realize that it was in God’s hands, and I praise God every day for knowing my heart and seeing the desire that was in me as a little girl.
My first glimpse of motherhood was not what you see in the movies, with a happy family holding a beautiful newborn baby. Instead, it was a devastating miscarriage. It left my husband Tim and I asking God why and clinging to His promise that He would bring beauty from ashes. The reality of what it means to be a mother and to love your child so fiercely became very real. Then, in God’s perfect timing, my husband and I had two healthy boys. Through all the highs and lows, bumps and bruises, God has shown me that they are truly His, just on loan for a short time to raise them the very best we know how.
Then a month ago, I was again reminded that my boys aren’t truly mine when both of our boys had long hospital stays. One day they were running around, playing baseball with their friends, and the next, I was rushing each of them to the hospital on separate occasions. There are no words for the confusion and worry we felt from each of them having ruptured appendixes just 3 weeks apart! I don’t know about you, but it felt like a horrible dream. Thankfully our prayers were answered, and both my boys went through their surgeries without complications, but it sure was scary while we were in the thick of it!
So, what do you do when you have an unfulfilled Mother’s Wish? Trust in God’s love and plan.
1. If longing for a child, pray persistently while resting in His timing (Jeremiah 29:11).
2. If grieving loss, find solace in God’s comforting presence (Psalm 34:18).
3. If your child struggles with health issues, have faith in God’s greater purpose (Romans 8:28). Through life’s joys and sorrows, cling to the One who knows your heart’s deepest Mother’s Wish.
As beautiful as motherhood can be, it can also be very challenging. Moms you know what I’m talking about! It’s in those moments when I’m clinging to God that I see Him refining me and making me to be more like Him. I’m reminded daily of His unending love and how He truly cares for me. He granted me my Mother’s Wish and I thank Him daily for all the blessings in my life. Lean into God’s promises and in His timing, I pray He answers your wish too!
